My Baby Boy

Dear Moms,
Today is my baby boys’ birthday. I guess you could say, he definitely is not a baby any more, in fact, today Sean Kevin Chase Mongan is 18 years old. In honor of his eighteenth birthday, I am going to post the last, life lessons. Last, but not least, our seventh child.
When God took our 8th baby Zachary home, after only two hours old, Sean became the baby of our family forever. Zachary was born full term, but none of us knew, how short his time with us would be. I will attest, that everyone’s life in our family was affected by Zachary’s death. The affect was both positive , as well as negative. In Sean’s case, the biggest negative affect, was that, I had, a “Mother’s Heart,” yet no baby to hold,. I gave Sean way too much motherly help, as well as, way too much attention. Instead of calling Sean on to maturity, to learn and to do things himself, like I did with the other children, I was always at Sean’s beck and call. In other words I enabled him. One of the benefits of a large family, as many of you all know, is the ability of raising very confident, responsible, and capable children . Sean was being robbed of this, and I was unaware that this was even occurring.
To top it off, Sean, being a pre-mature baby, was a sickly child. Yes, for the first thirteen years, of his life, it was very common for Sean to be home from school, every other week., with a fever, an upper repertory sickness or vomiting. It was very hard for him and extremely hard on me. On the positive side, I grew in compassion, and Sean in perseverance. Sean being a good suffer, never complained.
Now for he good news, God being God, who definitely has a calling on Sean’s life, was not going to let an over attentive mother, rob her child of virtue and grace. God intervened. My husband Pat, answered God’s call to become a deacon in our Catholic Church, when Sean was in the seventh grade. What did that mean? It meant that my husband and I would go out of town , one weekend a month , to study, for five years total. It was just what the doctor ordered for a woman and man with seven close together children. Yes, my husband, Pat, a Family Practice Physician was ready, to hang up his stethoscope, to take the Sacrament of Holy Orders. He was preparing to pour his whole life into serving the church, moving towards full time ministry. Thus, Pat’s second career., was birthed. When Sean entered high school, he found himself, “home alone,” one weekend a month. I began to coin a phrase, “Sean is raising himself, and he’s doing a great job.” He rose to the occasion, never complained, taught himself to cook, and when in doubt, ordered pizza. He made us proud, as he showed himself, not only to be responsible, but also, trustworthy. We hold these two virtues in high esteem in our home.
Another way God helped this over attentive mom out was by giving us grandchildren. I was able to nurture them, take my eyes off Sean. Sean showed himself as a very caring and fun uncle. I think, that all of the nieces and nephews, think of Sean as their favorite uncle.
On March 16, 2009, Pat and I welcomed our seventh grandchild, Ashlyn Hope to the family. Our plan was to leave immediately for Merritt Island, Florida, a soon as we heard the word, “labor and delivery. “ When I woke up that morning , I was surprised to see Sean laying on the bathroom floor, pale as can be. He said, “Mom, I feel sick, and I threw up eight times.” As I felt his head, I knew that he had a fever, as well. My husband and I weighted our options, packed slowly, and hoped for a miracle. Then after begging every family member to come be his nurse, and finding no one available, I stationed an angel to guard and take care of our seventeen year old son. With all the compassion of a mother’s heart, I asked , “ Sean are you going to be alright?” His response, showed forth the maturity that God had been working in him all along. Sean said, “Mom, I know that I am not your only child.” As I walked out the door, I prayed a pray of thanksgiving to Jesus, for the Man Of God Sean had become. Tears welled up in my eyes, as I learned a lesson as a mom that I will never forget. “Unless the Lord builds the house, you labor in vain to build it. God had housed a character full of virtue and selfless love in Sean’s heart, when I wasn’t even looking. A character that he took to Hawaii, a couple of weeks ago after high school graduation. Sean, didn’t go alone, God is with him and even though we miss him on this his eighteenth birthday, what better hands can he be in , than the palm of God’s hands.
Sean, the baby of seven children, who could have become a spoiled brat, has proven to me, that you can not spoil with love and attention. God is in control. Truly, Sean has a calling on his life.
Mom be the best mom you can be. Pray fervently and entrust them to God daily. He will fill in the gaps. That’s all for www.momsbestwisdom.com
As always,
Ellen