Merry Christmas!

Dear Moms,
I wanted to give a Christmas Message on my Blog. I decided to use the last chapter of my newest book, devotional, called “LET THER BE LAUGHTER AND A FEW TEARS TOO.” Please read it and pass it on.

GOD LOVES A CHEERFUL GIVER------GOD LOVES A CHEERFUL RECEIVER TOO!!

As I close this final chapter of this enormous undertaking of my 365 day devotional, “LET THER BE LAUGHTER AND A FEW TEARS TOO,” I can truly give GOD ALL THE GLORY! God, has walked me thru life experiences, then had me share His goodness with all of you. I know that I have already completed the 365 day devotional, but I had to take an oncour, a final bow and end the book with 366 days. God has just put this chapter on my heart and it is the Perfect closing for my book.
Here I sit at a Restaurant, called Panara’s, with my husband Pat,. It is our weekly, Saturday, routine date together, where we plan our week, pray together, and just plain catch up on each others lives. I am writing this in December, during the Christmas season, and I just noticed that there is a poster in Panara’s that reads, “GIVE, RECEIVE, REJOICE!!!.” How Ironic and appropriate as well,. It is truly a confirmation of what I am about to write.
You see God doesn’t just love a cheerful giver, but a cheerful receiver as well. During this Christmas Season I have thought about that a lot. I love to give, and I think about, myself as a cheerful giver. I even give extravolently, at times. I have actually had people say to me, “ Don’t Give To Me Any More.’ I am always baffled by that, so I conclude that they just don’t understand. You see many years ago, God freed me from the world’s bondage of , “GIVING TO GET,” and moved me right into God’s Grace of, “GIVING TO BLESS.” Let me tell you. “WHAT A GRACE THAT HAS BECOME IN MY LIFE.” “WHAT A FREEDOM , AS WELL.” The grace that flows thru me to move in the Spirit of God, to give when He says , “GIVE,” is powerful. If you haven’t experienced it, you just won’t understand it. Yes, years ago, God also spoke to me this Word, “ WHEN YOU ARE BEING PROSPERED, BE GOOD, BE GRATEFUL, AND BE GENEROUS.” It has become MY MOTTO. Now I have no problem praying for prosperity, so I can be used by God to bless others.
Christmas Shopping can become a burden,, especially when shopping for a large family, like mine, but I have a secret to simplify the process. My Prayer Partner, Judy, and I have prayed for years that as we walk thru the stores during the Christmas Season, the right gifts will catch our eye and just pop out at us saying, “BUY ME FOR _________. .” That has been my Christmas Shopping Adventure for some years. To tell you the truth, some times I buy gifts for the most random people, and only God knows WHY? My job is only to stay Prayerful, Seek God’s Face, Listen well and Obey the Voice of His Spirit.
This year, I came to a new awareness, that is , I personally, prefer to buy gifts for the , GRATEFUL OF HEART. I don’t think it is because I need the thank you, because heaven knows that God Blesses Me Back Enough. I came to realize that the gratefulness serve as an encouragement that, It Was A God Thing, not just A Good Thing!! It is so sad when you give to the Grumpy----now you still have to do it as a follower of Christ, because God says in His Word to, “LOVE UNCONDITIONALLY, AGAPE LOVE STYLE.” We must love as Jesus did and not expect anything in return. He died for those who love Him and those who refuse to love Him. ALTHOUGH, this agape love is easier said than done. Loving difficult people is the challenge we face sometimes daily , as our , “SPIRIT IS WILLING BUT OUR FLESH IS WEAK.:”
On the other hand, buying for those who truly appreciate, has become a TOTAL JOY for me. For example, I bought a random gift for one of Our Families Favorite Priests, Father Michael Libinski, this Christmas. In fact, I think this is how God taught me this lesson, that, ‘GOD LOVES A CHEERFUL RECEIVER.” First of all I was shopping at my favorite Store, Ross, and a gift caught my eye. It popped out at me and I immediately knew it would be the perfect gift for Father Michael. Those of you who know Father Michael will agree. It was a Plaque, and even though I usually refrain from buying plaques for people, it was what it said that seemed so approite in this case. It said:
LOVE GENEROUSLY
PRAISE LOUDLY
LIVE FULLY
I said to myself, “That is Father Michael. It Is The Perfect Gift.”
I laughed to myself as I put it in my cart and raced to the check out counter. You see I was on my way to meet my husband, Patrick, a Deacon,, at the staff luncheon, at the Church, and I was running late. Getting in my car, I was sure to thank the Lord that I had found the gift in the knick of time.
As I walked into the Church Hall, I was greeted by, who else, but Father Michael. I anxiously gave Him the present . He opened it instantly and began to read it out loud. He too laughed to himself, then remarked, “IT IS THE PERFECT GIFT FOR MY OFFICE.” I could tell, by the appreciation that He showed, that He too knew that God had guided me to select it, just to bless him . To top it off, the next day, less than 24 hours later, I received a genuine thank- you note in the mail.( and I live in Evans, out of town)
When I contemplated on Father Michael’s response , and thinking as well about Christmas coming, I couldn’t help but conclude, that God must feel the same way. I believe God TOO, LOVES A CHEERFUL RECEIVER.I think when we have a grateful heart toward God, it opens the door for God to Bless us some more. This Christmas is a good time to check our hearts. Ask yourself, my friend, “Are we so grateful for all God does for us daily? Do we have a grateful heart or are we a Grumpy Receiver?” Do you ever wonder why some people are so blessed? Watch their response to God’s goodness. Learn from Father Michael. Make it your aim to cultivate a THANKFUL HEART, a heart full of gratitude towards God and towards others.
This Christmas and every day this year, look for opportunities to BLESS OTHERS. Adopt the Motto, “GIVE TO BLESS, DON“T GIVE TO GET.” . Then if someone does bless you, for heaven sakes, BE A CHEERFUL RECEIVER.
My friend, when your cup is full, you are able to spill over and bless the others in your path. When your cup is empty, you want to keep the little you have for yourself. Fill your cup, this year my friend, by spending time in God’s presence. Let Him fill you to overflowing, then you will not be able to contain the blessing that God will pour into you. You will have no choice but to spill over to all you meet. Go into God’s Presence, EMPTY YOURSELF BEFORE HIM and LET HIM FILL YOU. Remember, “WE MUST DECREASE, WHILE HE INCREASE WITHIN US.” Then, “ THE MORE YOU HAVE, THE MORE WILL BE GIVEN UNTO YOU.” In the YEAR 2009, “MAY WE ALL BECOME EXTRAVOLANT GIVERS AND MAY WE ALL BECOME EXTRAVOLANT RECEIVERS.” TO GOD BE THE GLORY!!! FOR GOD LOVES A CHEERFUL GIVER, AND GOD LOVES A CHEERFUL RECEIVER. WHO CAN YOU LOVE INTO THE KINGDOM OF GOD TODAY? GIVE!!! RECEIVE!!! REJOICE!!! ALWAYS REMEMBER, IT IS THE PEOPLE WE MEET ALONG THE WAY THAT MAKES IT WORTH THE JOURNEY!!
MERRY CHRISTMAS FROM ELLEN MONGAN www.momsbestwisdom.com

Passing on Traditions

Dear Moms,
One of my greatest joys of being a parent, is seeing my children begin these same Traditions that I instilled in them in their youth, with their own children, not only at Christmas but throughout the entire year. Our Mongan Family Traditions are being passed down to the next generation-------to our grandchildren. What a blessing!
The words of an old Bill Gaither Song goes like this, “ WE HAVE THIS MOMENT TO HOLD IN OUR HANDS AND TO TOUCH AS IT SLIPS THRU OUR FINGERS LIKE SAND, YESTERDAY’S GONE AND TOMORROW MAY NEVER COME, BUT WE HAVE THIS MOMENT TODAY.” Make Memories Mom. Today may be your only tomorrow. Live today to the fullest.
Always remember MOM, you are the Heart to the Home. Family Traditions build the family, and as well as pass on your faith to your children. Remember also, “UNLESS THE LORD BUILDS THE HOUSE YOU LABOR N VAIN WHO BUILDS IT.” Pray about what Family Traditions God wants you to begin in your home.
What a tremendous responsibility motherhood is, especially in this very secular world we live in. If we don’t form our children, the world will gladly do it. We however, have the awesome responsibility of housing our children, first within our wombs, then within our homes and always in our hearts. Protect your children mom, shelter them with faith, morals, character, and traditions.
Let us pray:
“GOD MAKE US RIGHTEOUS MOTHERS, VESSALS THAT BRING CHRIST TO OUR CHILDREN. DEAR JESUS, LET US LEAD OUR CHILDREN BY EXAMPLE TOWARDS YOU, SO THAT YOU MAY ALWAYS LIVE IN THE CENTER OF THEIR HEARTS.”
Mom, what are some of your Christmas Family Traditions so I can post them? If this website has blessed you , tell a friend, tell a neighbor, tell your Church Family. I’d love to speak at your Church this year, connect me. Ellen
www.momsbestwisdom.com

Christmas Traditions (part 3)

Dear Moms,
We are really cutting this close, because Christmas will soon be here. You know how it goes, all the festivitities of the holiday season and all the Traditions, have set me back on my Website. However Motherhood is my heart and I am determined to finish the section of the Blog. So here Goes………….



CHRISTMAS DAY TRADITIONS

As I said earlier, we have changed our family Christmas, from Christmas Eve to the Saturday after Christmas. There is of course eating, drinking and all of us being very Merry. We have chosen this day of celebration, because it frees our adult children, who also have children, a chance to be in their own beds waiting for Santa to come down their chimney with care. We wouldn’t want them to miss him. It also gives my children a chance to be with their In-laws, if necessary. It give my husband Pat and I a chance to concentrate on Jesus alone, both on Christmas and Christmas Eve. Christmas Day, is usually a sit down dinner served with our best China. Since there are few of us , there is very little clean-up. We have been known to opt for paper plates---when the whole family gathers. I thank the Lord for whoever invented paper plates, which is God’s gift to large families. As we all sit around the table, we usually read, LUKE 1, as our blessing. Then we pass the Blessing Cup around, each taking a sip of the cup filled with wine after we as we THANK GOD for something He has done for us during the year. Since our children are older and usually go their own ways on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, these two days have become like a Sabbath Rest, where we just eat, then Chill and of course enjoy being with each other. Having the Saturday after Christmas as our Family Holiday, takes a lot of pressure off the Holiday, giving us a peaceful Christmas , as well as a few extra Days to shop. The Scripture I have chosen for Christmas Day is, “BLESS THE LORD OH MY SOUL, AND ALL THAT IS WITHIN ME, BLESS HIS HOLY Name.”



CHRISTMAS COOKIES

I almost forgot, since you already know that we like to cook together as a family, baking together is also an important part of our Christmas Family Tradition. We always pick a Saturday before Christmas, and every one bakes, moms, sometimes dads and always children. It is a BLAST ……… And………a DISASTER rolled into one. There is always, flour and sugar everywhere, not to mention eggs on the floor, and endless SPRINKLES. Oh how the grandkids love Sprinkles. They are in kid heaven and it is one big DELIGHT to watch. No one says, “DON’T SPILL,” because all Mongan are Klutzes,, except my husband Pat. If some one spills, my daughter Charity’s children will say, “THAT’S OK, NANA.” We all over look the mess and enjoy the moment. Christmas Baking is an important part of our family Christmas Season. Many of the cookies are shared with family , relatives and friend. They are Yummy because they are made with love. The bible says, “BE HOSPITABLE, ONE TO ANOTHER.” We live that scripture on the Christmas Baking Day. We have even been known to invite friends to bake with us., which adds to the pleasure. All our welcome at the Mongan’s Home. We have an OPEN HEART OPEN HOME MOTTO and always have.



THE NUTCRACKER

It is our yearly tradition to go to the performance of the Nutcracker during the Christmas Season. It makes a great, unforgettable, “GIRLS NIGHT OUT.” My granddaughter Bella, was so in awe last year, that as the ballerina’s got on stage, she remarked, “ARE THEY REAL, NANA?” The wonder of children. I personally loved the Arts and I love as well, any opportunity to share a moment appreciating the Arts with my children and grandchildren. My love of the arts is maybe because my Dad Bill Manfredi was a artist, or maybe it was because I was a Ballerina, in any event, I feel that all children should be exposed to the Arts. The Scripture I have chosen is, “WE ALL HAVE A VARIETY OF GIFTS.”

These are a few of the Mongan Family traditions. Our children look forward to these traditions which make our house a home. Many of our family traditions have changed as our children grew older. As I mentioned before, we only do those traditions that we can do peacefully. When a tradition becomes a burden, rather than a blessing, it is time to do away with that tradition or to alter the tradition. If a tradition is not kid friendly it will not bring about Family Bonding. Make the traditions enjoyable, please Mom.
That’s all for now. Time to get ready for yet another Christmas Party. I have a suggestion to make, How About Everyone Does Christmas Parties In November Or Else January, and leave December for us to get ready for Christmas. I don’t know about you but I’m a bit overwhelmed. ELLEN
www.momsbestwisdom.com

Christmas Traditions (part 2)

Dear Moms,


THE CHRISTMAS TREE

To continue with the Mongan Family Christmas Traditions, let’s talk about the Christmas Tree. We all know that it would not be Christmas, without the tree, symbolizing that Jesus is the tree of life. “ If you abide in Me and my words abide in you, you can ask anything and it will be done by my Father, who is in Heaven..“ We must all be Grafted into the Tree of Life. SO this is my Scripture for the Christmas Tree
. In our family finding the PERFECT CHRISTMAS TREE was a huge event. We would pick a Sunday close to Christmas, and head off to the Tree Farm. We would all ride the Hayride, at the Farm , then begin “THE HUNT.” I’m going to tell you the truth, the hunt is long and the hunt is hard, because my husband will not settle for anything less than perfection. Once our Tree is spotted, agreed upon by all and applauded, my husband, just like a faithful woodsman, chops down the tree with the help of all who are willing. Then we all get back on the Hayride, where the tree farmers, bag up our purchase, and my husband secures it to the top of our mini van.
Once home, in pops the Christmas CD’S ,as I begin making the Wassail, and the Hot Chocolate and everyone begins to decorate., our tree . That is, after my husband and sons have dragged our perfect Tree from the car to the great room. Once finished decorating, we all agree that it is the BIGGEST AND BEST TREE EVER. It is true family bonding in action and builds memories that are sure to last a lifetime.
I won’t tell you about the Christmas Tree Hunt where the tree actually fell off the top of the Mini van and never made it home. You’ll just have to read about it in my newest children’s book, “THE TREE THAT SAVED CHRISTMAS.“
The Christmas Tree is truly one of my favorite Family Traditions. It wouldn’t be Christmas without it.


The CHRISTMAS LETTER AND THE CHRISTMAS PICTURE

The Scripture for this tradition is,, “IF YOU WANT TO BOAST, BOAST IN THE LORD.” Every Thanksgiving Day , we gather together as a family and take the annual Christmas Picture. I , being a prior planner ,coordinate a color for all to wear, in advance and , most often, buy all the grandbabies matching outfits in advance, as well. Doing it at Thanksgiving, gives me enough time to get the photograph printed and sent out on time for Christmas. Plus our family is usually all together at my moms on that day. Some years, we opt for a beach picture on our Family Beach Trip or a Wedding Photo, depending if there is a Mongan Family Wedding that year. I have to be honest, no matter how well planned this family picture is, some people always complain and a few have been known to sabotaged the picture. One year on Beach Trip, a family member, who will remain anonymous, got other family members to wear sun glasses, while the phoghapher was snapping the shots. It was not a pretty picture.
In October I write the annual Christmas Letter.. It is one of those typed form letters, but it always comes from the heart. .It is more than a Family News letter or as it has been called, a “BRAG LETTER,” It is a way to share my faith with 500 of my favorite people, plus their family members. I make it my goal in the letter to Honor The Lord as well as, to share what God has done in our lives that year. I also l make it my aim in this letter to point the reader to Jesus. The family Picture and Letter go out together. Think about making this family tradition one of our own. Remember, “IF YOU WANT TO BOAST, BOAST IN THE LORD.”


THE CHRISTMAS BASKET

This is my commandment that you LOVE ONE ANOTHER, that you joy may be full, are the words of and old song. The words to that song are of course taken from Scripture. The way we live out that Scripture in our home is thru the Tradition called THE CHRISTMAS BASKET. Each year, all the Christmas Cards that we received are saved in a Basket which we place in the middle of our kitchen table. Then each night at diner, one child picks one card out of the basket. My husband proceeds to read the card out loud and then I share a little bit about that family, either memories of times together or even who they are and how we know them. I, later on in the week, write a letter to that family encouraging them in the Lord and telling them that we prayed for them. Some years, I opt to give a phone call instead of a letter. This is a great way to connect with old friends thru out th year. It is also a way to really enjoy the cards and letters sent to us. You know how busy Christmas can be and we usually rush thru the cards----the Christmas Basket is a way to treasure the cards and make Christmas last all year long. I challenge you to try this tradition, the children will really like it and it will teach them to Love One Another by praying for one another . Check out the website tomorrow for more Christmas Traditions. I will close now because I have to make my yearly Christmas Baklava.
Ellen
www.momsbestwisdom.com

Christmas Traditions

Dear Moms,
We will spend a portion of this Christmas Season talking about Traditions to help make Christmas come alive in the hearts of all who reside in your home. First of all , I’m going to tell you the secret to guarantee you will have the “BEST CHRISTMAS EVER.” Not only the best Christmas, but also, the “BEST YEAR EVER.” All you need to do is, learn to, “GIVE TO BLESS AND, NOT GIVE TO GET.” Then teach your family to do the same. Yes, Give and Don’t Count the Cost!! Give of your Time, and Don’t Count The Cost. Give of your Talent, and Don’t Count The Cost. Give of your Treasure and, Don’t Count the Cost. Give freely, and Do it for Jesus. So mom, as you address those Christmas Cards, Give to Bless!! As you bake those Cookies and share them, mom, Give To Bless. As you shop for all those Presents mom, Give to Bless. As you Wrap without any one volunteering to help you, mom, Give to Bless!! Christmas is a lot of work, especially for us moms, but make it a “LABOR OF LOVE.” Think of ways, like I do, to Bless random people, who least expect to hear from you, or receive from you. Be the “FRIEND THAT SAVED CHRISTMAS , to them.. I challenge you!!! Then I promise you it will be, “THE BEST CHRISTMAS EVER.” For as St. Francis says, “IT IS IN GIVING THAT WE RECEIVE AND IN DYING THAT WE ARE BORN TO ETERNAL LIFE.”

FAMILY TRADITIONS

Life is full of Memories!! I try very hard to make positive memories , and because of this, we are fond of traditions in our home. We actually seize every opportunity to make a memory. We want our children to enjoy our home more than any other place. As Dorothy said in the “WIZARD OF OZ,” “THERE IS NO PLACE LIKE HOME!” We desire that even our adult children, will have good memories of being in our home. I have read a lot of books on making memories and, I try to implement those traditions that I can do PEACEFULLY!! Everyone that knows me knows that I do not do winters, yet God in His goodness has placed my favorite holiday right in the dead of winter. Yes, , right when I need to have Jesus come alive in my heart and life more than ever before, we celebrate Christmas, the day Christ Jesus Our Lord was born. Now on Christmas, not only does Christ come alive in my heart and life, but also in the heart and life of the whole world. Young and old, black and white, believer and pagan alike, all join in Christmas Traditions. Yes, Christmas Time is full of Traditions. I will now list some of our favorite family traditions and explain briefly. I have put a scripture with each tradition. Here Goes:


St. Nicholas Day
This tradition is celebrated on December 6, each year, which is St. Nicholas’ Feast Day. Before going to bed on December 5, the children are asked to place their shoes outside the door of their bedroom. The next morning, to their delight, candy is found in their shoes, wrapped of course. This is by the wonder of Christmas the work of St. Nicholas, better known as SANTA CLAUS. Take the time on December 6th each year to read the story of St. Nicholas or better yet, invest in the movie. Make this a yearly read and a yearly movie, and , don’t forget the popcorn.
“BLESSED ARE THEY WHO WASH THEIR ROBES TO EAT FROM THE TREE OF LIFE.”

Secret Santa
When Advent starts, put each member of the families name in a hat, and mix it around. Then chose a name each, but not your own, and don’t tell a soul who you chose. Now spend the Advent Season doing , ACTS OF KINDNESS,” for the person whose name you picked. Do the Acts Of Kindness in SECRET, because, that’s half the fun. The other half of the fun is trying to guess who has who? For example, one family member leave the room to use the bathroom, they return to find their bed miraculously made. WHO DID IT? It could only the work of the SECRET SANTA! This tradition, builds family, and grows every one in the fruit of KINDNESS. Even a two year old, can join in the Fun, if you explain Secret Santa in toddler Vocabulary. Try this one, you will like it.
“GIVE AND IT WILL BE GIVEN UNTO YOU, PRESSED DOWN SHAKEN TOGETHER AND OVERFLOWING.”

The Advent Wreath
We do the traditional Advent Wreath, with the three purple candles, along with one pink one. We use an old Advent Book that is KID FRIENDLY, because it is Short and Simple. After diner we gather around the table together. My older children would take turns lighting the approite candle or candles. My husband would read the page for the day. Once we have prayed together as a family, the younger children would take turns blowing out the candles. This was a time to honor the Lord as a family, and all were expected to participate. My younger children loved this practice so much , that we made lighting a candle a daily practice., all year long. We began each day of my pre-schooler life lighting a candle and singing the song, “THIS IS THE DAY.” then of course, I would let them blow out the candle, over and over again if necessary.
“JESUS IS THE LIGHT OF THE WORLD.”
Ellen
www.momsbestwisdom.com

Funny things kids say III...

Dear Moms,
Did you ever hear a child say something that makes you laugh, and later on you think to yourself, “I WISH I HAD SAID THAT.” Followed by the thought, “THOSE WERE THE WORDS OF A GENIUS.” Yes, children are thinking all the time and it is amazing how their minds work. They can truly teach us something new each day, and bring us a chuckle at the same time. These ingenious thoughts will be remembered for many years to come, and I hope that they will make us laugh generation after generation. This section is called………

MOM, I THINK I’M A GENIUS

When I decided to go blonde, my hair turned Red instead. My young daughter Tarolyn watched this whole process, then commented, “MOM, NOW THAT YOU ARE AREDHEAD, YOU WILL PROBALLY RUN FASTER!”


When Kaitlin was three years old, she asked me to teach her to tie her shoes. Having a busy day, I only showed her one time, but to my surprise, she caught on right away. The next day, I said, “KAITLIN, YOU ARE ONLY THREE YEARS OLD AND, YOU ALREADY KNOW HOW TO TIE YOUR SHOES!!” Kaitlin looked at me and replied , “MOM, I THINK I’M A GENIUS.”



It was a rain storm and the electricity went off throughout the entire house . Little Tarolyn volunteered, “MOM, WANT ME TO HOLD THE FLASHLIGHT WHILE YOU COOK ON THE STOVE?”



Joshua and Monica, both age six were walking thru the fog one day and talking. Josh was overheard saying, “MONICA, DID YOU KNOW, WHEN YOU ARE WALKING THRU THE FOG, IT IS NOT FOGGY.”


One Sunday morning as we were all sitting around the breakfast table and reading the paper. Kaitlin , age 3, was tying her shoes, a new skill she had learned. When some one would talk, she would immediately say, “ SHHHH, I’M TYING MY SHOES.” I was trying to help her out, so as each child joined us at the breakfast table, I would repeat, “SHHHH, KAITLIN IS TYING HER SHOES.” Everyone obediently hushed, until, in walked WISE OLD TYLER, A TEENAGER. Tyler walked up to Kaitlin and gently remarked, “KAITLIN, YOU NEED TO LEARN HOW TO TIE YOUR SHOES UNDER PRESSURE.” (no wonder, EVERYONE LOVES TYLER)



What ingenious things have your lille ones said? E-Mail me, and we will post your child’s funny comments on the website. ELLEN
momsbestwisdom@yahoo.com

www.momsbestwisdom.com

More Funny Things Kids Say II...

Dear Moms,
We all know that, “LAUGHTER WORKS LIKE MEDICINE.” After all the joys and sufferings that Thanksgiving Family Bonding brings us, we could al use a little laugh about now. The second chapter that I am taking, parts of my book “FUNNY THINGS COME IN SMALL PACKAGES,” from is called, “It’s All In A Word.” Children sometimes think that they know what something means when they actual don’t exactly know what it means. You’ll see what I mean, in a minute.
Did you realize that we only comprehend 70% of the words we hear. Our minds fill in the rest according to the context of our conversation. Did you ever notice that when an adult doesn’t understand what you are saying, after two times of repeating, “ WHAT,” they say, “CAN YOU SPELL IT?” Obliviously, children cannot do that until they can spell. Instead, when children hear something, they run with it., They proceed to use the words they heard in a sentence and are sure they are using it correctly. That is another good reason that God gave them parents, Parents can guide them in their ever growing vocabulary and laugh with them along the way. In any event, “ Have You Ever Been Pregnant and broke your water bed?”
Here are some examples of, “It’s all in a word:”:
Kaitlin age four and one half, ran into the kitchen and announced, “Mom, I know what starts with Y, WILD!!!”
One time my husband Pat and I were talking about a couple that had gone on vacation in Miami, where Pat’s parents lived. Our daughter Charity got angry and said, “IT’S MY GRANDMA’S AMI. I was pregnant with our seventh child and very close to delivery. Every night I would say to the children, “If m y water bag breaks , then mommy will go to the hospital, and have our baby.” On Father’s Day, we woke up and Kaitlin age four said, ,”SO MOM, DID YOUR WATER BED BREAK?” It was laughable indeed.
Kaitlin age four, has Godparents, who have the last name of WHITE. One day while watching TV, Kaitlin came running into my bedroom saying, “MY GODPARENTS ARE ON TV, MY GODPARENTS ARE ON TV, THEY SAID THE WHITE HOUSE.”
One day while the children were playing together and shouting at each other, my husband called out from another part of the house, “ BE PATIENT, CHILDREN.” Amanda age 3, looked at me and said, “PATIENCE ARE SICK.” I wondered what she meant until she began to explain, “WHEN JENNY BABYSITS US, WE PLAY DOCTOR , AND ALL THE PATIENTS ARE SICK.”
During my fourth pregnancy, we spent a lot of time trying to decide a name for the new baby. I would read the name books out loud , and ask everyone in the families opinion of that name. One day I came across the name Patience. “HOW ABOUT THE NAME PATIENCE, PATRICK?”I asked my husband, waiting for his reply. Charity, age three, piped in with, “THEN WE COULD SAY, WAIT, PATIENCE.”
It’s all in a word. If you just read between the lines, you can see that your toddler is real putting thought behind their sentences. Even if it doesn’t make sense to you, to him or her it’s just PLAIN ENGLISH, TODDLER STYLE, THAT IS. If you can’t understand toddlers, just wait until they become teens. Mom listen between the lines and listen with your heart. You won’t believe how quickly your vocabulary will grow. Their vocabulary will grow as well. In the midst of all that communication, IT WILL DO WONDERS FOR YOUR RELATIONSHIP. REMEMBER, IT’S ALL IN A WORD. Now, I got to go do Christmas Cards. ELLEN
www.momsbestwisdom.com

More Funny Things Kids Say...

Dear Moms,
Kids say the darnest things. Years ago I wrote a book called, FUNNY THINGS COME IN SMALL PACKAGES.” I encouraged moms to write down the funny things their children say while it is fresh in their minds. Years down the road you won’t remember who said what, especially after multiple children. This week I am going to share a couple of these cute funnies from each chapter. The last one I’m going to share is not from the book, but from my grandaughter Bella. Yes, you grandma’s out there write down all those cute things your grandchildren say.

WEE WISDOM
Children are wonderful and at times they are even wise. Their wisdom of course is on a whole different level than ours. Sometimes it makes sense to them, and we might even be able to see how that works. However it doesn’t always line up with the real world. These are the kind of things that I call, “WEE WISDOM.” It is cute how old they seem when they are really quite small, yet wise beyond their years. Here are some wise thoughts from the wee ones.

Amanda, Age 7
Said, “MOM how come make-up makes you look younger when you put it on, and makes me look older when I put it on?”

Laura Age 5
My niece Laura was spending the month of July us and had the problem of losing her shoes. We were on vacation and traveling by car. After going thru four pairs of shoes all lost in the car, I told her she needed to look for her shoes. Laura replied, “Aunt Ellen, we are on vacation and vacation means a break from the every day routine of life, so I can’t look for my shoes.”
Now mom who can argue with wisdom like that?

Kaitlin Age 3
Kaitlin was watching TV with me and I said, “ Kaitlin, would you rather mom have a baby or you be mom’s baby?” Kaitlin smiled and said, “ I want you to have another baby.” Then she thought a moment and added, “ How about if we don’t have a dad and we have a baby?” Mom answered, “Kaitlin, you can’t have a baby without a dad.” The Kaitlin said angrily, ’BUT MOM, DAD DOESN’T WANT A BABY.”

Out of the mouth of babes !!! What are your little Blessings saying to bring a smile to your face and help you put the Christmas Rush in perspective. Treasure the moment because they won’t be little forever. Share with us all. We could all use a good belly laugh.

That's it; I’m exhausted, ELLEN
www.momsbestwisdom.com

Funny things kids say...

Grandchildren are a gift from God. I personally feel that one of the grandparent’s role is to pass on their faith to their grandchildren. So that’s just what I try to do, whenever I’m with one of my five grandchildren. My one grandchild, Bella and I have what we call, “ Nana and Me Days.”. Bella, age four, and I often sing songs to Jesus and talk about our God. One spring day we even took out a Nativity Scene, which once was a Pre-School bulletin board, and acted out the Birth of our Savior.Bella was so impressed that she wanted to do it again and again. Yet I didn‘t really know how much she retained, until one day this spring. I‘ll never forget that moment of grace. Bella and I were playing, when Bella said, “Nana, I told Emily. that Jesus loves her and He loves me too“. Knowing that Emily ,was her best friend, of the same age, I was inquisitive about what Emily’s response would be. “Bella,” I said with a smile in my voice, “What did Emily say back.?” “Nana, Emily said, I Didn’t know that.” I was overjoyed as I said, “Bella, you are an Evangelist, because you tell people about Jesus.” Then we both burst into song with a verse of Jesus Loves Me. I couldn’t help but replace the word me with the word Bella and Emily, which brought uncontrollable giggles to both of us. I guess Bella has been listening to Nana after all.
As I contemplated that moment I couldn’t help but think, how many adults are just like four year old Emily, they just don’t know that? Oh how the Body of Christ needs more Evangelists like Bella., Yes as the Bible says , THE HARVEST IS PLENTY BUT THE WORKERS ARE FEW. Will you tell someone today, that Jesus loves them, who doesn’t know that, like Bella did? You too can be an Evangelist no matter what your age. You are never too old, and you are never too young, to tell someone the Good News. Bella is living proof of that..

Thanking God for our Husbands

Dear Moms,
Everyone knows that if you are to have a balanced life your husband has to come first, next to God of course. If you are a single parent, my hat is off to you. God promises in His word that He would take care of widows and orphans. He will indeed be your husband as you depend totally on Him. However for those of us who are married, do I have some advice for you. In my dental office there is a plaque that reads, ignore your teeth and they will go away. Think about this ignore your husband and he will go away, as well. Most people who are divorced will say, “WE JUST GREW APART.” Ladies, marriage is one of those parts of your life that you have to work on daily. Then you grow together and not apart. My husband and I teach Engaged weekend at our Catholics for those couple seeking to receive the Sacrament of Matrimony. We teach and we believe ,in the fact that the couple comes ahead of the children, the home, the friend, the outside activities, yes even ahead of yourself. This is easier said then done, so here are some practical tips, tried and true.
1. Communicate daily-heart to heart.
2.Have a date weekly
3.Pray together daily.
4.Work out conflicts quickly.
5.Always be the first to say , “ I’m sorry.”
6.Honor one another and defer to one another.
7.Say, “I LOVE YOU” often
8.Start the day by asking your husband if there is anything that you can do for him and do that first.
9.Thank each other even for the little things.
10.Reverence and respect your husband.
Every day when I look at my husband , I think of all we have been thru, the good times as well as the bad. How we’ve been together in sickness and in health. How God has made us one physically, mentally as well as spiritually. How we have birthed babies, as well as buried a baby together. We’ve done all this hand and hand ,as we have walked the path that God has chosen for us. It helps that Patrick, my husband looks like George Clooney, but even if he didn’t I am committed to death do us part. Yes, when I said my marriage vows, even if I was only twenty years old at the time, I meant them. As Ed, a friend of Pat’s family who married us said when speaking about the vows, “THEY TOOK.” How about you ? Are you putting your marriage first after you relationship to God, or has something else taken that place in your heart? Ladies when you stand before God, He’s not going to ask how many souls you saved or even how clean was you house, but rather how did you live out you vocation of marriage. This is my commandment that you love one another that your joy may be full, are the words of an old song. It should be are marriage theme song. Start today live the marriage covenant lovingly. God’s plan always works best. Marriage was his idea in the first place. Go back and read Genesis 1.
What do you think? ASK ELLEN
www.momsbestwisdom.com

Remember When

Dear Moms,
I’m sad to finish this section on thankfulness, because I believe that having a thankful heart is a key to opening yourself up for God’s blessings to you. Praise and thanking God need to be a part of our every day life. No, how can we can’t count our blessings if we can’t see our blessings.? Pray for eyes to see God’s blessings in your life, and ears to hear God speaking just to you, I guarantee you will be full of thanksgiving and joy.
There is and old Bill Gaither Song that goes like this, “WE HAVE THIS MOMENT TO HOLD IN OUR HANDS, AND TO TOUCH AS IT RUNS THRU OUR FINGERS LIKE SAND, YESTERDAYS GONE AND TOMORROW MAY NEVER COME BUT WE HAVE THIS MOMENT TODAY.” That one sentence says so much. We have no guarantee in this life that we will be here for tomorrow. Only God knows the day that we will take our last breathe and say our goodbyes to all we love. Some people don’t even get the chance to say goodbye. We are only given this moment to live to the fullest, so live it with all your heart and treasure the moment, mom. Yes, live each day like it is your last..
This Thanksgiving our family is going to do something very different. I hope that it will become a family tradition. We are to gather together with a glass of wine in hand and toast my dad who died almost two years ago. My dad always loved Thanksgiving, because it meant being with the entire family. So together we will honor dad and share memories of times with dad and thanksgiving for the way he formed our lives and made us the people we are today. I so look forward to this as my mom, my siblings, my children, my husband, myself will all be a part of this celebration of a life well lived. I hope that we will hear a memory that we did not know before from someone else’s life. I know Dad will be smiling down from heaven enjoying the moment and God the Father will be smiling as well as we show honor to our earthly father.
As I was thinking about this blog, I thought about memories, that live forever in our hearts. I thought about reconnection with people, I thought of touching a life for Christ in ways you will never know until you go to your heavenly home. Who lives in your memory mom? Is it your first grade teacher, who made such an impression on your heart, that you vowed to be a teacher one day yourself, and now you are. Is it that Best Friend who you shared secrets with and laughed until you sides ached on those all night sleep over, then she moved to another city. Is it your step children who you raised as your own, until your husband left you taking them out of your life. Is it a mother of one of your classmates in middle school who helped to form your faith? If it wasn’t for her bold witness you may not know Jesus today? Is it a broken relationship of you and your parents, you and your siblings, you and a friend or you and a grown child? Life gets busy, time flies, we always put off until tomorrow. Don’t procrastinate any longer, repair that relationship today. Reconnect to that teacher and thank her. Call that Best Friend and laugh until your sides ache. Write those Step children a letter to let them know they still live in your heart. Encourage that mother in the faith she passed down to you. Now is the time. Tomorrow may never come, but we have this moment today. Remember when, do some memory searching, my friend , then reach out in love. Who knows , some one may even reach out to you this season, and your FLASH FROM THE PAST,” could be a life changing moment. It never can happen if people don’t learn to listen to that still small voice of God in their heart, then act on His leadings. Relationship are not only important to me, they are important to God. So take this blog to pray mom, then DO WHATEVER HE TELLS YOU. God will turn your water into wine and people will bubble over with joy.
Happy Thanksgiving to all,
Ellen
www.momsbestwisdom.com

The Kindness Box

Dear Moms,
Jesus says, “WE ARE THE LIGHT OF THE WORLD . LET YOUR LIGHT SO SHINE BEFORE MEN THAT WILL SEE YOUR GOOD WORKS AND GIVE GLORY TO GOD THE FATHER.” We al know so well the Scripture, BY GRACE ARE YOU SAVED, THRU FAITH, NOT OF OURSELF, IT IS A GIFT OF GOD. One way we can let out light shine before men and love them into the Kingdom of God is by doing random Acts of Kindness. I believe that even though we are not saved by good works but because of our Savior and Lord Jesus Christ’s shed Blood on the cross, we should live in the Spirit doing a life of good works. These good works should flow out of a heart of Gratefulness and not out of duty That said I am going to concentrate on a different angle of thankfulness today. This is a practical way to cultivate a thankful heart in others including your husband and your children.
Aa my children grew older and more self sufficient, I began to be called by God into numerous ministries. One of my favorite ministries God put on my heart to do I call the “KINDNESS BOX.” I have a black leather container, in the kitchen near the phone , which I have given this nickname. The kindness box is used to house slips of paper that I collect throughout the week. For example if some one calls me and they say Susan’s father just died. I immediately write down, on a slip of paper, send Susan a Mass card for her dad. If I get wind that Jeanne is going thru a hard time with one of her children, a write down on another slip of paper, send Jeanne a word of encouragement. If my brother is taking the Bar in California or my son in law has a job interview, my slip of paper will read write to Craig or Dan and tell them I am praying for them. I collect random acts of kindness that I can perform to bless another when they least expect in, yet need it the most. Once a week I sit down with a pen, note cards, my address book and a prayer, inviting the Holy Spirit to lead me to just what to say to each person. I some times add one of my books as my gift to bless them, again as the Lord leads. This ministry takes a couple hours of my time each week and can be costly. All letters are mailed at the Post Office. This is one of my favorite ministries, that God calls me to be a part of. This ministries cultivates a Thankful Heart in all who receive these letters. How do I know this? Many times I will get feedback from the either with a phone call or a thank you card. Then it is my turn to be thankful, knowing that I was lead by God’ Spirit to bless that person. I am always looking for opportunities to thank others as well. This ministry combines two of my favorite things, Reviving the lost art of letter writing and blessing people I may not ever know. Often friends or family members, that know I have the “KINDNESS BOX,” will actual call me and ask me to send some one a card or note of encouragement. I never refuse, Every one loves to get mail and just hearing from and old friend, a family member or a stranger is a great cause to rejoice. This ministry is truly a labor of love. Since Charity begins at home, I always look for ways to bless, my husband, my children, my mom. My siblings and of course my grandbabies. One of my favorite Scriptures is , “GIVE AND IT SHALL BE GIVEN UNTO YOU. PRESSED DOWN, SHAKEN TOGETHER AND OVERFLOWING.” This “Kindness Box,” is great way to grow the fruit of Kindness in your heart.
Every one loves to hear the words, “YOU’VE GOT MAIL,” especially your children. Mail your children letters occasionally, even if they live in the same house as you. They will truly JUMP FOR JOY! The element of surprise adds to the pleasure, so mail them a letter when they least expect it. A WAY TO GO CARD, when they make the team that that trained so hard for ,or made the honor roll for the first time. An apology letter when you have been wrong. Or a letter of encouragement when their best friend has moved away. All these acts of kindness done in Christ’s name is a special way to say I love you, and I care. Thankfulness will grow in their hearts and it will bring a smile to both your faces as they mention to you how much you letter blessed them. Mom, even if they don’t say a word, you will know that it touched them by the Additude of their heart. Now mom make this a habit in their lives as well, encourage them to do random acts of kindness, thru letter writing. Have them write a thank you card to the grandparents, a card to a sick friend or letter to a sibling who is away at college. Connecting with people in this way is a great habit to pass down to your children. It will bring such joy and thanksgiving to you when you receive feedback like this, You’ll never guess who I heard from this week , followed by , “IT MADE MY DAY!”
Don’t leave your husband out . I send my husband a letter, card or some form of mail every week. It is a little way of letting him know that I am thinking about him. He says that he always opens the mail when He is all alone because he never knows what will be in the envelop. This gives the element of surprise and a touch of romance all rolled into one.
E-Mail is great but there is nothing better than a letter write in your own handwriting that the receiver can read and reread, knowing that it came straight from you heart. So let you light shine, establish a kindness box or even a kindness drawer in your kitchen will do. Take the time to let those you love know you care.
That’s All From Ellen
www.momsbestwisdom.com



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Retreat

Dear Moms:
I have a group of gals I go on retreat with twice a year. This group of four has been retreating together for almost 20 years. That’s commitment, my friend. We have laughed together, cried together, been pregnant together, nursed our babies together, shared our lives, shared our wisdom, shared our hearts and most important shared our prayers together. Retreats are planned and enjoyed by all , even if it means bringing a nursing baby along. We delight in sharing with all we meet , on retreat weekend, that together we have 22 children. People just roll their eyes at us. In our younger days, one of these dear sisters in the Lord used to point out a group of old and gray Senior woman in a foursome, like us, and say that’s us in 20 years. Well, I guess you could say she was prophetic, and the jokes on us, as now 20 years later we are those woman, older and grayer, and wiser for the journey. I trust these ladies with my life. We have learned to trust each others correction , as well as each others encouragement, and tremendous growth has happened because of our commitment to retreat together. This is my recipe for moms to be able to grow spiritually, retreating two times a year with three other trusted friends. You‘ll be glad you did.
So why do I write this under a subject called Thankfulness? You see one of our friends moved from Aiken, South Carolina to Greenville, South Carolina. And two of us went to visit this past weekend. As always God moved, it was life changing and I thought you might want to gleam from what we learned. As amazing as it may seem, when we began to pray for each other, as God would have it, we were all working on the exact same area of our lives. We were all trying to overcome anger, which grew into bitterness, which produced the fruit of complaining. As we beseeched the Lord Jesus Christ, the Holy Spirit quickened to one of the girls, “REPLACE COMPLAINING WITH THANKSGIVING.” They did not know that that was the subject of my blog this week. Once home I realized that this was a huge revelation. It was just what moms need to hear. How many moms go thru a day complaining and not even realizing that they had a anger problem that grew into bitterness and they were now eating the fruit of complaining with their ears deaf to it. Ask the Lord to make you aware of what is coming out of your mouth. You will be amazed. “You didn’t wet your diaper again?” “Can’t you learn to pick up your own toys? “ “Do I have to do everything around this place?” “All I ask for is a little help?” “ I’m going to scream because I am so frustrated with you!” Sound familiar mom. That believe it or not is complaining. We all do it so often that we don’t even hear ourselves any more. The first step to change is knowing that there is something that needs changing. We all prayed on th retreat, that God would guard our tongue and give us a grateful heart. I think it is working, because I for one am bubbling over with joy. I know this is true because I had lunch with a friend and she remarked , “she’s on caffeine.” This freedom from complaining and making a conscience effort to be thankful has lightened my load and set me free. The truth will set you free, if you walk in God’s truth. When the Son sets you free, you are free indeed.
As Thanksgiving Day approaches, let us make a new start. Let us fill our hearts with praise to the Lord for the many blessings He has bestowed on our lives. Let us guard our tongues, and guard our hearts. Let us replace, bad habits with good habits. Let Thanksgiving overflow in your life as God reign in your heart.
That’s all for Ellen www.momsbestwisdom .com

Thanksgiving Week

Dear Moms,
Thanksgiving is coming, a day set aside to count our blessings. God’s word says, “IN EVERYTHING GIVE THANKS FOR THIS IS THE WILL OF GOD IN CHRIST JESUS FOR YOU.” He also encourages, REJOICE ALWAYS, PRAY CONSTANTLY, AND GIVE THANKS IN ALL CIRCUMSTANCES.” I guess God’s perfect will is that we have a grateful heart 365 days a year. We, moms, need to help our children to cultivate a thankful heart, as well. So how do we do that? First off, Mom, do you have a thankful heart yourself, even when it is not Thanksgiving? Remember a child is a mimic. They we will do what you do, quicker than they do what you say. What is coming out of your mouth mom? What is coming out of your child’s mouth mom? Secondly, another way to cultivate a thankful heart is to make the choice to guard your tongue and use positive parenting. An example of a positive parent with a thankful heart would be the following conversation, “THANK YOU FOR PICKING UP YOUR ROOM CARTER, IT LOOKS GREAT.” Remember mom all these principles are learned. They are usually learned thru repetition. Do not tire in the training process, once accomplished, it will bear good fruit .Remember to make the changes first in yourself. Pray, “LORD CHANGE ME.”
Thankfulness can not be demanded, because it must come from the heart, God’s Word says, “OUT OF THE ABUNDANCE OF THE HEART, THE MOUTH SPEAKS.” Thankfulness should be encouraged and taught. You will often hear a mom say, over and over again, “SAY THANK YOU, GRANT.” Soon Grant will be saying, “ MOMMY, YOU NEED TO SAY THANK YOU.” Is Grant being disrespectful? No, not at all. Grant is telling his mom, “ I’m listening , and I’m learning.” That is a time to rejoice greatly with Grant, and praising him highly. Do you know what that will cause Grant to do? He will want to say thank you more. In fact he will be looking actively for opportunities to thank you. It is similar to when they learn to say, “I LOVE YOU.” In a way your child is learning that there is power in their words, power to please.
Not only should your child learn how to thank people, but also how to thank God, Thanking God acts as a form of prayer. Be a good example mom. Thank God out loud when a prayer is answered. Start a new tradition, go around the diner table, thanking God for one thing each. Thanksgiving is a good time to start this tradition. You could even pass a glass of wine around the table, like we do, and each person is asked to take a sip and thank God for something. We call the challis where we put the wine, THE BLESSING CUP. There are a lot of ways to teach Thankfulness. We want our children to be grateful people. This habit, taught young, will serve them well their whole life. God loves a thankful heart, it opens one up for great blessings. I too love to be around a cheerful and thankful people. How about you? No one likes to be around a grumbler? When God’s people grumbled in the desert, what happened to them? Read Exodus? I don’t know about you, but I don’t want to spend 40 days in the desert, and I don’t even think I like quail?
Many years ago I learned a way to pray that was quite helpful. It took the word ACTS and had a Key word for each letter. Here is the key words.
A---ADORATION
C---CONTRICITION
T---THANKSFULNESS
S---SUPPLICATION
Thankfulness is a very important part of a prayer time for a child as well as for an adult. If we teach our children to thank God more than we ask Him for things, it will become a habit. Thankfulness is also avery important part of everyday life. So mom, be the good example. This is a necessary and important, life lesson and character trait to learn. What are you going to thank God for today? What will you thank your child for today? Let me hear your feedback. I’m looking forward to hearing from you.
Ellen at www.momsbestwisdom.com

Jealousy 5

Dear Moms,
This is the last attempt I am going to make to give my wisdom and experience on the area of jealousy. I felt that the Lord put on my heart to write about this area of jealousy that you may not of thought of before. It comes in the form of a word of caution to us moms It is an insight I have, thru life experiences, of how we can avoid being a stumbling block to another mother, causing her to fall into the sin of jealousy. Now we would never purposely do this, of course. My hope that this awareness will help us to be sensitive to other mothers who may struggle in this area of jealousy.
Let‘s face it mom, when our child accomplishes a milestone in their life, we get excited. Yes, so excited that we want to tell the whole world You can hear a new mom say, “Oh my baby slept thru the night at six month old.” You can hear a toddler mom say, “At our house, we have NO MORE DIAPERS. Meghan is Potty Trained.” You can hear a Middle school mom exclaim, “Ryan got all A‘s on his report card.” You can even hear an older mom rejoice with, “My daughter is getting married.” Now you know that I am all about, REJOICE WITH THOSE WHO REJOICE AND SORROW WITH THOSE WHO SORROW,” but some times this innocent rejoicing, can grow into boasting or bragging. Timing is everything mom Most moms are able to rejoice with you on your child‘s accomplishments, unless it is bad timing. If the conversation goes like this, “My baby is a year old and he is still not sleeping thru the night.” that is not the time to share how great a sleeper your newborn is. I who have had seven babies in a row who woke up every two hours for their first year of life, have trouble rejoicing with these moms. Instead the jealousy in me causes me to say, “You should write a book on how to get your newborn to sleep thru the night.” I sarcastically add, “I want to buy the first copy.” They then almost always add, “OH, it was nothing I did. They just started sleeping thru the night on their own.” Now those are just the encouraging words I need to chase the jealousy blue away. If at a girl talk coffee , one mom desperately comments, “Kevin, is still having accidents during the day and wets his bed almost every night. I don‘t know what to do?” That is not the time to mention you toilet trained Meghan in just one day. I‘m afraid that Kevin‘s mom is going to ask you to train him. She will say something like this, I‘d like to see you train Kevin in just one day“. She may even add, “I dare you ,” or better yet, ,”I‘ll pay you.” If a friend calls you crying because their daughter just flunked math, she doesn‘t want to hear how Ryan‘s name is on the honor roll all year. Lastly, if you have a friend whose child has a hard time finding a date, their excitement level will not be over the roof on your daughters engagement.
As Christians, we are taught to guard our tongue. Again timing is everything. Look at who your audience is as well. If its your mom, Brag on. Yet if it is a person who is struggling in the are you have succeeded, in it might be a good idea not to mention this good news at that time. I love good news, and I’m probably guilty of bragging a lot, so I am speaking to myself, as well as to you, moms. We need to learn like the scripture says, “HOW PRECIOUS IS A WORD SPOKEN IN DUE SEASON.” We need to speak words of life and words of healing. For instance, when I was frustrated over potty training my seventh child, over two,( even though all his siblings were trained on their two year old birthday,) a wise woman said, “Ellen, I can assure you, he will not go to kindergarten in diapers.” Even though I wasn’t too sure what she said was true, it did give me hope.
Now we are not responsible for how people are going to react to our good news, but we can be sensitive to others as we learn to listen between the lines. This is a good barometer, look at their response to our comment. The other barometer is the gift of the Holy Spirit in our hearts. If the Holy Spirit convicts you, be quick to forgive or ask forgiveness. It will keep the lines of communication open between you and others and between you and God. No we don’t ever want to be a stumbling block to any one.
Motherhood often finds us walking along an unknown path. We need to all realize that every child is unique and grows and develops at a different time lines. Learning not to compare your child to other children and even learning not to compare yourself to other mothers. This is my recipe for avoiding jealousy. God never compares u to any one. In fact,. He says, “YOU ARE FEARFULLY AND WONDERFULLY MADE.” Begin to see yourself as God does, then you will have a lot to rejoice about. That knowledge alone should be enough to keep jealousy far from your heart. So let the GOOD NEWS ROLL.
ELLEN www.momsbestwisdom.com

Jealousy 4

Dear Moms,
No one is really exempt from the jealousy monster. It can even attack us big people if we don‘t guard our hearts. You know how they say, “WHEN YOU GET OLDER, YOU TURN INTO YOUR MOTHER?” It is a true statement. You see as we age we begin to understand why our mom did things the way she did . Then we are able to forgive her, for things we judged her, and maybe even held bitterness toward her because of the way she raised us. How does this miracle of the heart come about? You see as we walk thru life circumstance, and yes mature, we begin to realize why she did things the way she did ,because we make the same decisions. .This healing of heart causes us to love and cherish our moms more .I think that it is a work of God.
I say all this because, when my mom was raising me, she had a late in life baby, my sister Julie. Julie, was raised as an only child because, she was so much younger than all the other siblings. Was Julie spoiled? Of course she was . Julie was given everything her heart desired. She received not only any material thing she wanted, but also, all my mom’s love and all my mom’s attention. As a sixteen year old child, when Julie was born, I couldn’t understand, this at all. You see when I was being raised, we never even had the money for a new dress. In fact we were so poor that my mom would actually take us to a store, look at Prom Dresses, draw the dress on a piece of paper, then go home an attempt to sew the dress. You can imagine what it looked like. I guess you could say I was jealous, because when Julie was the same age, she not only had the Prom Dress of her choice, but also competed in many, many Beauty Pageants. We all know the money it takes to be in a Beauty Pageant. This jealousy didn‘t stop Julie and I from growing into best friends. She was kind enough to pass all her clothes down to my daughters and I.
One day, as life went on, I found myself with a late in life baby myself. .Sean was a preemie, and was ill a lot. It seemed like every other week, but you know how us moms exaggerate and remember things big. I had to give Sean, a lot of my time and a lot of my attention, even though I had six other children living at home. To top it off, we had made the decision to put my children in Catholic School. The other children had been raised in Christian Community, where uniforms were the standard even on a High School level . What did that mean? It meant, the baby girl, our sixth child, Kaitlin, needed a fashion wardrobe. When raising the other children, because there were so many, there was never extra funds to buy even a new dress, no way was there a wardrobe fund. Remember, we all wore Julie’s hand me downs . Now with only three children at home, and not having to tithe to Christian Community, there was a lot of extra money, for our baby girl to buy the clothing desire of her heart. Do you see a pattern here. My mom was quick to point out, “ now do you see why Julie was given everything she wanted?” I had to admit I did. No you don‘t set out in parenting to give one child more than another, but circumstances change and people change. Life is God‘s way of changing us on the inside. I have to admit, as I got older, I turned into my mother. My mother who I had once judged and, yes held bitterness toward, I now understood. It helps to walk a mile in a person‘s shoes.. What about my other children? Is there any jealousy present? Of course there is, any one would be jealous in these circumstances. Being a Christian mother, as well as, having already walked this path before myself, I try extremely hard to make it up to them. I dote on their children, and try to visit frequently, serving my children in any way I can.. When I visit, we often do a shopping spree just for them, for no reason at all. For that short time, I encourage them to enjoy being the only child with all my love and all my attention. We both treasure this time together.
Now that I am older and wiser, I know that as life goes on in their life, and they become their mother, they too will understand, why I did things the way I did.. I guess you can say, ”IT’S THE CIRCLE OF LIFE. What do you think moms?
Ellen www.momsbestwisdom.com

Jealousy 3

Dear Moms,
We are discussing the topic of jealousy this week. One of the ways to assure that your child will have issues with jealousy, is for a parent to favor one child over another child. Another way to guarantee a jealousy problem between siblings is to treat one child harsher than the other children, or reject a child. Most times this is innocently done and the parent is not aware of their actions. At least, thinking the best of the parent, I sure hope not. You’d think, if a parent became aware of the fact that they were either favoring a child or, heaven forbid being harsh to a child or even rejecting a child, they would immediately repent and thus change their behavior. So how is it that this problem even exists? Some times parents are in denial and they are un able to see their own fault even when pointed out to them. Moms check your heart. Are you giving your children equal love and equal attention and equal encouragement? Another reason this happens is when one child gets on your nerves. You know the saying,” I have one nerve left and you are getting on it.” In other word most likely a personality conflict exists between mother and child. Mom that is no excuse, you are the adult and you need to, thru the grace of God, overcome this. My suggestion to you is take this child to God in prayer each day and ask God to change your heart. Ask God to change your child’s behavior. Ask God to reveal to you their good qualities and to help you accept them for the person they are, faults and all.
Another suggestion I can make comes from a suggestion I received from a friend. The reason I mention it, is that it bore such good fruit. One of her children not only got on her nerves, but also on her husband’s nerves as well. This was at a certain age in the child’s life, probably middle school,. We all know how tough puberty is. After brainstorming together, they came up with a game plan. They decided that every time they would pass by the child they would make a conscious effort to give the child a big hug followed by an encouraging word or a, “I LOVE YOU.” We all know from 1Cor.13 that, “LOVE NEVER FAILS.” This plan sure succeeded above and beyond their expectations. This child, now grown is a confident, well adjust, as well as , well liked individual. If you meet this child you’d probably guess that they were the parents favorite all along. These excellent parents, have succeeded in making all their children feel like they are the favorite. Now isn’t that just what God does to His children. He loves us all Best. That is our goal moms to love them all the Best.
I was fortunate enough that none of my children got on my nerves for very long. Oh, I had my days. Don’t we all. I did have the experience where other peoples children got on my nerves. This became quite a trial since we were the, “ kid friendly house,” where all the children hung out. Some times it was just a daily prayer matter and another opportunity to choose over my flesh. The good news was they didn’t live with me. God has a way of teaching us to love the unlovable. If you think about it some days some one is praying to God to help them love you. Yes, some days we are the unlovable. If we remember Jesus’ words, LET HE WITH NO SINS THROW THE FIRST STONE.” Then remember the price that Our Savior willing paid for our sins, we are some how able to cut our child a little slack, no matter how annoying they have been that day
There are a few examples in Scripture where parent played favorites. If you are interested, read the story of the twins Essua and Jacob,, in the book of Genesis. Their mother, Rebekeka loved Jacob, and yes favored him. Their father Isaac, found Essua to be the apple of his eye. You need to read the story yourself to see what fruit they bore for their in ability to give their twin boys equal love. The bible character Sarah , also found in Genesis was unable to love her step son Ishmael, like she loved her son Isaac. This not only caused problems for Ishmael, but also for his father Abraham and his birth mother Haggai as well. The bible is full of example of how to parent. We can learn what to do and what not to do if we study God’s word. I hope this has give you some food for thought.
Parenting, no one ever said it would be easy. Let me caution you, if you think that you child will not notice that you are favoring, treating them harshly or rejecting them, you are wrong. I think they are the first to notice even if you act that way for one day. Listen to your child, mom. Even if is not real to you it is real to them, so if they point it out or your spouse points it out, thank them and take it to prayer.
Jealousy can not be eliminated from our fallen human nature, but mom we surely don’t want to be the cause of leading our child into a sin that could become a life long habit pattern. So do your best to love one another equally, for, “Love is from God and those who love are form God, for God is love.”
That’s all from Ellen www.momsbestwisdom.com

Jealousy 2

Dear Moms,
Jealousy is not limited to toddlers, although they are the most likely
Age group to voice their opinion about their jealousy issues, out loud. No, the truth is that any one, at any age can be known to fall into this sin. The only difference is that at two, they are not accountable, remember seven is said to be the age of accountability. Any one younger than seven is being trained to avoid sin and replace it with virtue. Scripture says, “REJOICE WITH THOSE WHO REJOICE AND SORROW WITH THOSE WHO SORROW.” This is easier said than done, especially when someone is given an award, ,or a promotion, or a compliment, or even a coat of many colors, that we secretly hoped had been ours. Yes, the sin of jealousy is very evident in the Scriptures. Ask Joseph’s brothers how they felt when their father blessed Joseph alone with a coat of many colors. Wait a minute, you don’t have to ask them, the bible tells us that they were so jealous that they put him in the bottom of a well. Then had him sold into slavery. I guess you could say that they were jealous. It didn’t help any that Joseph boasted about his beautiful gift wearing it with pride, making sure all the brothers took note. We can first locate jealousy in Genesis, the very first book of the Bible. You see Cain was so jealous of his brother Able, when Abel’s gift pleased God more, that he killed Abel. Yes, jealousy, unrepented of can grow to murder. That is why moms, we need to be diligent to teach our children not only how to channel their anger and jealousy, but also how to learn the power and the freedom of forgiveness. We need to teach them also, how to rejoice when something good happens to one of their siblings.
One way we would accomplish this in our home and try to avoid jealousy was to try to always be there as a family for every event for each child. No matter how big or how small the happening was we were there to cheer, support. and encourage. This was no small task as we raised seven close together children, who were all very active and accomplished. None the less we tried, even if it meant eating dinner together in the bleachers of a Basketball Game, or dragging our newborn to an out of town soccer tournament and freezing our toes off. One thing that saved us was that our children were only allowed to participate in one activity per season. No one seemed to complain about going to a sibling’s event because, they knew that their siblings would be there in turn to support them. These events became our families main form of entertainment. A certain healthy, family pride replaced jealousy as we all cheered the family member on they made the winning goal, or shoot the final basket, or even walked down the homecoming court. All were present as one child graduated as valedictorian of her senior class. Way to go Amanda! There was definitely no jealousy there as all would agree, no one worked harder than Amanda.
This being there for your children is no fool proof guarantee that there will not be jealousy or disappointment. We actually have one child that believes we were never there for him. He has no recollection of the time and money we spent carpooling him and friends on his traveling soccer team. Don’t let your child’s opinion cause you to get down on yourself, you are the adult and most children are remembering with their sometime vague childhood memory. You of course lived along side their life as an adult.
Jealousy is one of those character defects that some people have a lot of trouble with and some people almost never have trouble with at all. My advice to you as a mom is try to form your child with a giving heart at their earliest formation, where they are able to be happy when others are blessed. It will serve them well their entire life. It is harder to un learn a character flaw as an adult, than to learn a virtue as a young child. If you have a child over seven that tend to wallow in jealousy and self pity, work against it by finding opportunities for them to bless others without expecting any thing in return. If their focus is directed on others rather than themselves, they can’t help but chase all jealousy away. Just like there is always some one who has more than you, there is always someone who has less. Teach your child to be that person who looks to make a different instead of looking to get a pat on the back. That knowledge of pleasing the Lord Jesus and that inner satisfaction of a deed well done, will out way the tempory pleasure of being acknowledged. Teach them that we live our life for an audience of one and He will reward us for a job well done. As my son Sean says, “OUR REWARD IS NOT ON THIS EARTH. OUR REWARD IS IN HEAVEN.” We want to hear one voice say, “WELL DONE YOU GOOD AND FAITHFUL SERVANT,” and that is the voice of our God.
Lastly, food for thought. My sister Julie was at a birthday party with her son when I called her yesterday. This birthday boy age 10 was opting to have a Toys For Tots party, instead of a party for himself. It was a huge celebration and apparenting a yearly event. I for our not only want to meet this young man but also the parents that are raising him. No jealousy resides in his camp as he welcomes gifts to bless others, instead of himself. I have to say , “WELL DONE YOU GOOD AND FAITHFUL SERVANT.” May God Bless your day. Ellen www.momsbestwisdom.com

Jealousy

Dear Moms,
Upon the request of my daughter, who just ushered in a new baby into her family, joining a two year old sibling, I’ve chosen the topic of jealousy. What a great topic. Jealousy is real at any age, especially to a toddler who is welcoming a new brother or sister. I for one, just like all of you moms out there tried very, very hard to make all the children feel equal love and equal acceptance, I have to admit, even with the best of efforts, some jealousy is going to occur. In fact, I believe it is a natural and yes needed stage of development, that you would rather they voice , and yes act out , immediately after the new baby arrives, rather than suppress and show later on. The jealousy is going to come out in some form, it is not a question of if, but rather a question of when and a question of how. It is as normal as temper-tantrums for two year olds and rebellion for teens.
What causes jealousy to occur? Most toddlers feel that they are the center of the universe, the whole universe. And in their two year old mind the whole universe is their home, their mommy and their daddy. When the new baby joins the family, with all their God- given cuteness and yes total dependence on mom as well, it turns our little toddlers world upside down. As much as mom and dad try to live their lives business as usual, it is anything but usual. Babies change everything, your time, is no longer your own for one , especially if you are nursing your newborn. You, mom are recovering from a birth, which is no small thing even if your labor was short like mine. You, mom are also adjusting to being a full time caregiver to this new life, while at the same time balancing your old life. You have added a lot of extra responsibility, yet subtracted no extra responsibility. To add to the mix, you are surviving on little or even no sleep. If your babies are like my newborns, there is a lot of crying going on at your house. It’s not all newborn tears either, if you are a normal mom, you’ve shed a tear or two too. Add a temper- tantrum toddler to the mix and let’s face it, some days, you are just over the top. So what is a mother to do?
Some things in motherhood have easy answers, some do not. Jealousy is not any easy problem to overcome, it takes a lot of patience and a lot of time. The main concept that you have to get across to the siblings ,no matter what their age, is that mommy and daddy have enough love to go around to them all. The other concept that you have to get across is that the new baby can never replace them. How do you do that you might ask? I can tell you some things I did to ease in their adjustment.
1. I made a conscience effort to make them a part of the babies life as soon as possible. I actually can home from the hospital an hour after giving birth because my husband is a physician. The new sibling was introduced immediately.
2. The baby came bearing gifts for the siblings.
3. I let all the children hold the baby immediately and upon request.
4. When the children were in the room I gave them attention and not the baby.
5. I would let my husband hold the baby so I had two arms free for my toddler.
6.I always had my newborn in the snuggly so that I could pay attention and meet the needs of all the family members.
7. I would set aside a certain time each day to do a special project or outing with the toddler.
8. I would read to the toddler at night while my husband held the baby.
9. I would encourage the toddler to take an active part in caring for the newborn like going to get the diapers, picking out clothes for the Baby to wear , and I would be sure and praise them for their efforts.
10. I would encourage them like, “our baby does cry a lot, that makes me sad, “Or If they said, “ I wish our baby would go away, “I would say, them you would miss her. She is going to grow up one day and play with you, won’t that be fun?
11. If at all possible I would take the toddler on a Outing without the baby, leaving the baby home with dad..
12. I would market the Big Girl Or Big boy theme, “Wow, you are great Lego builder, that’s because you are a big boy.” Or let’s play dress up and put on make up because you are a big girl. Babies can’t do fun stuff like that.” Or let’s bake together and eat cookies” “Babies can’t do that, they don’t have teeth.”
13. Lastly , I would market the fact of how much the baby love them. Look He smiled at you, he sure loves his big brother.
Mom, with a little bit of extra TLC time, a lot of extra patience and a healthy dose of love mixed with a lot of creativity that God will inspire this normal phase of development will pass. God will see you thru and you probably, like labor will not even remember it.
It’s Ellen. www,momsbestwisdom.com

E is for Encourage

Dear Moms,
Once again we are at the finish line. This time on our subject of Discipline. The final key letter being E for ENCOURAGE. I know we touched on this on one of the other sections, but I can’t stress enough just how important Encouragement is in the area of discipline. If you remember we discipline our children to get them to change a particular behavior, that is the goal of discipline. Not to harm our children, not to blow off steam, not even to get them to stop doing things that just annoy you. Remember God says to, “TRAIN UP YOUR CHILD IN THE WAY OF THE LORD.” Loving disciplining you child teaches them to choose righteous, Godly behavior, over sin. It teaches them to be form by the principles of the Bible and how to walk in the ways of the Lord our God .Sometimes a punishment is extremely effective in changing a child’s behavior, sometimes it is not. We must do what works.
Encouraging a child can be very effective in changing a child’s behavior, especially if your child is a people pleaser. Many children are so willing to please their parents that they will do anything it takes to get their parent attention of praise. These children love encouragement, and positive attention. This is a parent’ s compliant child, usually. That is why it is a must for parents to get to know each child individually. As we said, “WHAT WORKS FOR YOUR COMPLIANT CHILD, MOST LIKELY WILL NOT WORK FOR YOU STRONG WILLED CHILD. If you child changes his behavior because of Praise and Encouragement, give them a daily dose of just that and lots of it. I promise you, your friends and neighbors will all be jealous and beg you to tell them your secret. They may even ask you to write a book on the subject. Before your head gets to swelled up, take it from me, it is the child, not necessarily the parenting skills. The secret, I can tell you , “IT IS BY THE GRACE OF GOD.” Praise still by far is my favorite form of discipline. It is always my first choice in trying to change a particular behavior. The truth is, like any thing else, it will not work with every child.
If you child is strong willed, it will require stronger measures of discipline on your part. Some strong willed children actually like the negative attention of hearing you raise your voice, or punishing them. They may be known to try to get your goat on many occasion, daily if possible. I heard a Preacher say, “THEY CAN ONLY GET YOUR GOAT IF YOU HAVE A GOAT TO GET.” Do you have a goat to get, mom. In the same way, they can only push your buttons, if you have buttons to push. Mom keep your goat and your buttons under the authority of Jesus Christ and under the control of the Holy Spirit. Not only does your child need daily encouragement, but so do you mom. You need the Encouragement that only God can give. Don’t be surprised mom if God is using encouragement in you life to change your behavior as well. God is the perfect parent and a wise parent .Let us copy our Creator. Let us be imitators of Christ. Yes, we must encourage our children daily. Sometimes it will work and sometimes it will not work, but never mom stop encouraging.
I believe that the words said to our children, help to form their self image. We want our children to have a positive self image. Use your words wisely, for once said, you cannot take them back. Words wrongly spoken, wound, sometimes they wound deep. Protect your child, do not crush their spirit. Train yourself to as James says in the Bible, “ BE QUICK TO LISTEN, SLOW TO SPEAK AND SLOW TO ANGER.” Be like the proverbs 31 Woman, “AND THE LAW OF KINDNESS WAS ON HER LIPS.”
ENCOURAGE ONE ANOTHER IN THE LORD,” the Bible tells you so. Mom start with those little children that God entrusted in your care to form into soldiers for the army of God.
Mom Discipline, when you break the word down one letter at a time, it doesn’t seem all that hard to do. I’ve given you some tools, have they been helpful? What would you add. E-Mail me Ellen. www.momsbestwisdom.com

N is for Next Time

Dear Moms,
How many times have you heard a mom say, “The next time you do that, you will be punished.” or How many times have you heard a mom say, “The next time you say that you will be punished.” If you heard them say it more than one time, it is more than one time too many, they should be saying it, in my book. They are on the right tract, however. I believe a mom should always give a warning, especially to a preschooler. In fact, that is the next key word on the topic of discipline, for the letter N….NEXT TIME.
Always give a warning, one warning, not two not three, not etc. Your child is smart, in fact, he or she is a genius. They will quickly learned to obey, one step before the punishment is given. So if you warn two times, they will obey after two times. I wanted my children to obey on the first time. You would often hear me say, when I was parenting my seven blessings from God, “YOU NEED TO OBEY ON THE FIRST TIME, I AM NOT GOING TO ASK YOU AGAIN, YOU WILL BE DISCIPLINED.”
I did believe in giving a warning. Why ? If Johnny doesn’t know that it is a spank able offense to smash cheerios in the rug, he will be shocked and offended by the spanking. The warning makes it clear of the rules, especially for toddler who forget the rules if not reminded daily, and sometimes hourly. When warning a child I would stoop down to their level look them right in the eye, eye ball to eye ball. I would hold their little face if necessary. This even works for teenagers. The second part of the equation is that after warning them once and stating what the consequences would be if they did not obey, I would follow thru on what I said. Remember, A mom needs to be consistent. Rules need to be the same every day. A mom needs to be a woman of her word. If she says it, she has to do it. There is safety and security, for a child in being parented by a mom who gives one warning then acts righteously to follow thru. Anything short of that is just an empty threat. Children will quickly learn if you are a follow thru mom or not. A woman of her word raises confident children. What happens if you are not a follow thru mom? YOUR CHILDREN TEST YOU…..SOMETIMES ALL DAY LONG. You see they just want to see how far they can go before you mean what you say. A follow thru mom raises children who obey on the first time. Do you want obedient children or testers?
What do you do if you have spent most of your motherhood, warning and not following thru? You sit down with your children and have a heart to heart talk with them. You say, Mommy has been noticing that things are not going so well around here, there are going to be some changes made. First off, I will give one warning them I will discipline you if you do not obey. Once you have made the new rules clear there will be a time of testing, I promise you that, however you will bear good fruit if you are consistent. Scripture says, LET YOUR YES BE YES AND YOUR NO BE NO.” It is never too late mom. You will be doing your child a tremendous favor to train them up in the way of the Lord. IT IS God‘s command to us.
It is very important, mom, to only let your children play at the homes where you feel comfortable with the discipline and the rules, as well as the parenting skills. My children mainly played at my house. They preferred it that way. We had the kid friendly house as well as the fun house. I made sure of that. If my children wanted to play at a friends house, you could be sure that I knew the parents well and what kind of environment I was letting them go into. Mom take this very seriously, you cannot be too cautious in today’s society. Check it out carefully. There may be more than over warning going on there and it is your job mom that your child is safe at all times. If you have a check in you spirit, It may be the Holy Spirit sending you a Red Flag. Yes, the Holy Spirit give warnings as well as Moms. Just like our child needs to heed our warnings, we must train yourself to heed the warnings of the Spirit of God. Pray that your heart be in tune with God’s heart and that you too mom have ears open to obedience. God’ s Word is lamp unto our feet. God’s Spirit is our guide thru this life here on earth. Take God’s hand. Follow along the path He has Chosen for you to walk.
That’s all for today I have an exercise class. E-MAIL ME ELLEN. wwwmomsbestwisdom.com

I is for Inability

Dear Moms,

I hope this series on discipline has been helpful. There are only three key words left to talk about. The next key word for the letter I is INABILITY TO COPE. There’s an old song that goes like this, “ MY MAMA SAID THERE WILL BE DAYS LIKE THIS THERE WILL BE DAYS LIKE THIS MY MAMA SAID.” Just knowing that there will be days like this, days that you will feel an inability to cope, that information alone will be a help in getting thru one of those day. Even though that song was not intended to be about motherhood, I wanted to use it to make my point. What is my point, you might be asking yourself? My point is Mom, YOU ARE NOT ALONE. Every Mom, if the truth be told, has a day like this, where she wants to run away to a Caribbean Island, change her name and never change another Pamper again. A day when she is a desperate woman, who is convinced that she can’t go on. She may even feel that she doesn’t love her child or her children. The key word is a day, like this. If however this these days go on for weeks, this is a RED FLAG. Most Mothers realize after a day or two, that they can’t afford a trip to the Caribbean, that they actually like their name and it isn’t so bad changing the Pampers. In other words they realize that their emotions were getting the best of them, and they were just having a bad day. You see mature moms realize that love is a choice and not a feeling. Just like in the scripture I Corinthians 13,which states the qualities of love. What it doesn’t state however is that we must choose to walk in these virtues. Don’t panic mom God will give us the grace to do just that as we spend daily time with him.

Now what if this feeling just doesn’t go away. This feeling of inability to cope, this lack of love for our child, this desperation to run away, what do you do then, mom? This, like I said, is a Red Flag, a warning sign, a cry for help, which should never be ignored. It is very real and needs attention, you can not just pray it away. Here are some important ideas of what to do:
1. Tell your husband immediately, maybe he can take on some of the responsibilities that you are carrying.
2. This is a great time to schedule a meeting with that Older Woman or Spiritual Director, we talked about in another section.
3. Get a break, hire a babysitter, or a maid, or a mother’s helper. If you don’t have the finances for this, trade off with a friend that you trust with your children.
4. Ask your mom to come for a visit. In most cases she can be another set of hands and a wealth of wisdom.
5. Get a new hairdo or buy a new dress. We are woman, some times we just need a lift. How we look on the outside does affect how we feel on the inside.
6. Get into a exercise routine. Every woman is different, chose what flavor of exercise you enjoy, a class, a sport, running, going to the gym, or just popping in a DVD. What ever it is do it regularly, at least three times a week .Exercise will be great to change your outlook on your day.
7. Get a support system of other mothers , who have children the same ages as your children. Get together weekly if not more often.
8. Get a Prayer Partner that can pray with you daily. A person you can call any time day or night that you know you can depend on.
9. Get outdoors. Go for a daily walk, even if it is with the children, and enjoy the sunshine.
10. Go see your doctor. You physical state does affect your mental state. Get a check up to see what is going on.
11. Get some sleep. Nap if possible. We are human, we need sleep. A good night sleep does wonders.
12. Maybe it is time to take a Romantic Get Away with your husband. .How about the Caribbean?

Mom, take some of these practical suggestions. There is always help available. You are not in this alone. There are people who can and will help. Don’t go it alone. ASK FOR HELP. Remember, no one is exempt, all of us have days like this, that’s why my mama said there would be days like this.
E-mail me, ELLEN, I’D like to help!
www.momsbestwisdom.com

L is for Love

Dear Moms,
“This is my commandment that you love one another that your joy may be full.” The words of that old Christian Song are never more true than in the area of Motherhood .There is nothing more precious than a mother’s love poured out agape’ style on all of her children. That is why love is not only the next key word but also the most important key word in this section on discipline. Mom, always ere toward love. An expectant mother often wonders if they will have enough love for their next child. They love the ones they have so much especially , if they only have one child. Then God blesses them with a second child. They wonder if they will love this child as much as their first. They pray fervently to God for the grace to do just that. Yes, God is always faithful. God showed me a long time ago that the more love we pour out, the more love He fills us with. I know it is a Scriptural Principle, “GIVE AND IT SHLL BE GIVEN UNTO YOU,DOWN, SHAKEN TOGETHER , AND OVERFLOWING. God’s word is true and if He said it, He will surely do it .Think of it as a word picture of th milk supply of a nursing mother, the more milk the baby drinks, the more milk the mom makes. In the same way as you give love out, God fills you with more love to give. It is a principle of supply and demand.
Two key things are important, Love and Consistence. If a mother is strict, yet loving and consistent, her children will most likely become strong and well adjusted adults. If a mother is lenient ,yet loving, and consistent, her children will most likely become strong, and well adjusted adults. I have seen this play out in my life and the lives of other mothers who parented children ,when I was raising my children. I have also observed adults who lacked the qualities of love and consistency and their children were not so well adjusted. My conclusion of my people watching was, IT DOES NOT MATTER SO MUCH IF YOU ARE STRICT OR IF YOU ARE LIENTIENT, WHAT MATTERS MOST IS ARE YOU LOVING AND ARE YOU CONSISTENT. I however believe on trying to strike a healthy balance between being a strict parent and being a lenient parent.
Moms, listen to your children, and let them know how important they are to you. Make sure that they know just how much you love them. Show your love to them not only in words, but also in actions. Never, ever, take your love away as a form of punishment. Your love should be given freely and without end, as God’s Love is given to you. You mom, are your child’s view of God. Your child will feel secure in God’s Love, if your child is secure in your love. Always be ready to give a hug and say, “ I understand.” You might add, “I love you and I will always love you, but that was still wrong. I love you too much to let you be disobedient. After all, I am accountable to God for your behavior. I am raising you for the KINGDOM OF GOD.
The definition of what God means by the word Love is explained thoroughly in the Scripture I Corinthians 13. Read this Scripture Verse slowly and insert the word Mom instead of the word love. It would go something like this…“Mom is very patient. Mom is very kind. Mom is not boastful. Mom is not proud.” If you are any thing like me you will quickly realize that you have a long way to go to become the mother God desires you to be. In disciplining our children let I Corinthians 13 be our measuring stick. Let love be our guide. Let us pray to God each day to be filled with the love we need to discipline our children using Godly Principles. Let us strive to be an example to the world of disciplining our children kindly, patiently, and with the agape’ love that only God can give. Read I Corinthians 13 daily if possible, it will change your heart and it will change your life. Yes, God changes us from within as we spend time with Him.
That’s all from Ellen. www.momsbestwisdom.com

And the winner is...

comment #14--frugallm who said:
My best mothering tip is to let the dishes sit in the sink and sit down and play with your kids!

I guess since we were late in posting the giveaway, it only makes sense to be late in posting the winner! Thanks to everyone who visited our blog and entered!

Bloggy Giveaway!

We're getting into this giveaway late, but welcome to those of you who made it to our site!

We are a relatively new blog and website hoping to provide moms with tips on mothering and marriage, ideas for entertaining your children, and support to help you be the best mom you can be. Take a look around our main site to find information on everything from starting your own music playgroup to keeping the romance in your marriage after kids! Check our blog daily for ideas to entertain your kids and keep your sanity as a mom, while at the same time raising your children in a Christian environment. Our archives contain all kinds of ideas on projects and activities based on the letters of alphabet, and our recent posts contain lots advice on a variety of parenting topics. We would love for the blog to become a platform for discussion on these topics, so come back and join the conversation! Currently, we are discussing discipline.

The giveaway is a bible study specifically for mothers (Mom's Best Wisdom Bible Study), and we will through in a few other mom books too!

(The book was written by Ellen Mongan, a mother of seven children, and a Christian writer and speaker. She, along with her daughters, Tarolyn and Amanda, founded this site.)

To win, simply leave a comment giving your best mothering tip! Since we’re entering this carnival late, the giveaway will end at 9 pm (EST) on Saturday, November 1st.

For more great giveaways, visit the carnival at Bloggy Giveaways!

P is for Plan

Dear Moms,
Did you ever hear the Girl Scout Motto? It is “BE PREPARED.” Motherhood is one job in life that you never know all the answers . You must expect the unexpected, yet the best advice I can give you is, “IT ALWAYS HELPS TO DO YOUR HOMEWORK.” Yes, just like your favorite school teacher used to say. So I guess, the Girl Scout Motto works for Motherhood, as well. In other words. Have a well thought out Plan. In fact that is the next key word in our study of discipline. Having a plan is step two of Intelligent Decisions. Reading about motherhood gives you the information on a problem that may arise. Once you have read the material, then you, mom, need to plan how you will implement the information if that discipline problem occurs. You do not want to be caught off guard. You do not want to just discipline as you go. As my husband says, “Moms, need to make thoughtful decisions.”
Have a plan. Now I am wise enough to know that sometimes the plan may not work. Yes, even the most well thought out plans fail. A mom might be heard saying, “IT LOOKED SO GOOD ON PAPER.” OR, “I GUESS DR. DOBSON WAS WRONG.“ No, Dr. Dobson wasn’t wrong. Remember every child is different and every mother is different. This is the beauty of the fact that, “ WE ARE FEARFULLY AND WONDERFULLY MADE,” from Psalms. Mom, “IF AT FIRST YOU DON’T SUCCEED, TRY, TRY, AGAIN.” Have the same rules for each child every time. BE CONSISTENT. Try the plan for a few days, and if no Victory is in sight, research a new plan. This will result in perseverance, a wonderful character trait that a mom can’t live without. Seek and you will find the answer. After being a studier of God’s Word for over 30 years, I am convinced, that there is an answer to every problem in the Word of God. We just have to dig deep enough and search hard enough, and pray fervently enough.
Sometimes our answer comes to us from another person., that would be, “GOD WITH SKIN ON.” Oh how I thank God for the Body of Christ. When I was raising my children, I always had an Older Woman, as described in the Book of Titus. A woman, older and wiser than I, who had walked the path before me that I was now trodding. I think every young mother should actively seek out such a woman who can mentor them along the path and help them through the hard spots. These woman are not only a wealth of knowledge, but an ear to listen to you and even sometimes a shoulder to cry on. Isn’t that why God in His wisdom suggests that the older woman should teach the younger woman. Read Titus.
It is my personal belief that Mary went to visit Elizabeth, (found in LUKE) not only to serve her, but also to sit at her feet and learn from her some motherhood skills. Mary was a young girl, Elizabeth an older woman. Elizabeth had probably nurtured, many children before. This is just my personal opinion. You will not find it in the Scriptures, but doesn’t it make sense to you? Otherwise, why would a newly pregnant, probably very nauseated young girl, like Mary make a long trip on a donkey of all things, to serve her on in years, cousin. We do know that Mary had a good heart, but I suggest that she had a seeking heart as well. The Book of Proverbs says, “A WISE MAN LISTENS TO THE COUNSEL OF MANY.” There was no one wiser than The Blessed Mother.
So mom read all you can, then formulate a plan, seek the advice of an older woman and pray a lot. Then be flexible and humble enough to admit when the plan is not working. Then it is back to the drawing board. As the old song goes, THEN PICK YOURSELF UP, DUST YOURSELF OFF AND START ALL OVER AGAIN. I told you that you won’t know all the answers. I guess you could say that MOTHERHOOD IS GOD’S WAY OF KEEPING US HUMBLE. It can baffle at times even the wisest of us. I told the Pre Cana Class, that my husband and I teach, “ IF YOU WANT TO KEEP YOUR MARRIAGE FROM BEING BORING, HAVE A HOUSEFUL OF CHILDREN,” Yes, mom, If Your Quiver Is Full, Your Life Will Never Be Dull. You can Quote me on that, because I live it.
So mom what do you think? Are you a planner? E -Mail Ellen.

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